Dedicated to Robert Eugene Frieden (my Grandpa): April 19, 1920 - November 13, 2013
Whenever I see an fuel oil delivery truck I think of my grandpa. I spent many a summer day riding in his big red truck as he made his deliveries. These are some of the words I shared at his funeral today:
There are moments in one’s life that no one wants to experience, but in living them you simply acknowledge that you are honored or privileged to be a part of the moment … this day and my experience with my grandfather’s life were just that … an honor and privilege.
We shared something … a name … more precisely initials … REF. F - Frieden; E- Eugene; and my R was Rodney. That’s REF like my Grandpa (Robert) like my Dad (Ronald) and like my son (Riley).
I haven’t always embraced that commonality. I didn’t want to be a Rodney … I wanted to be Rod and I certainly never wanted to be a Eugene. The important thing in all of this is that growing up I wanted to be like my Grandpa (no my Dad).
I wanted to drive a big red truck like my Grandpa.
I wanted to be as strong as my Grandpa.
I wanted everyone to like me like they liked my Grandpa. It seemed everyone knew him and that everyone was his friend.
I hoped to one day know as much about everything the way my Grandpa seemingly did.
I even wanted my hair to be wavy just like Grandpa's.
My Grandpa was one of the coolest people I knew and I wanted to be just like him when I grew up.
After all what’s not to like about a man that makes ice cream and fudge, hides candy by his bedside, and drives a big red truck!
As I grew older, dreams of driving a truck changed. I even gave up on having wavy hair - the length of my hair became an ongoing debate for me and my Grandpa (it was never short enough for him). I also discovered my own interests and those weren’t always the same as Grandpa’s. Heck, we didn’t even root for the same baseball team - He the Cubs and me the Reds! But even as my dreams grew and changed, one thing remained the same - I still wanted to grow up to be just like my Grandpa – honest, caring, selfless, strong of will, gentle of spirit, a man of quiet yet strong faith - a man of integrity.
Today (like most fathers), I struggle with the task of raising a son who thinks his Grandpa is way cooler than his own Dad. But the lessons I learned growing up have become the key to living with that frustration. What I have learned is that if I can teach my son to be proud of his name Riley Eugene Frieden and the stories and heritage that have come before it … If I can remember to teach him about the man who started this tradition --- not what he did, but who he was and what he stood for ... If I can do that, I will succeed in teaching my son the most important lessons in life:
When you grow up, Grow up to be just like your great grandpa and your grandpa - that's what I have tried to do. Learn to say your name with pride and hold your head high.
I even wanted my hair to be wavy just like Grandpa's.
My Grandpa was one of the coolest people I knew and I wanted to be just like him when I grew up.
After all what’s not to like about a man that makes ice cream and fudge, hides candy by his bedside, and drives a big red truck!
As I grew older, dreams of driving a truck changed. I even gave up on having wavy hair - the length of my hair became an ongoing debate for me and my Grandpa (it was never short enough for him). I also discovered my own interests and those weren’t always the same as Grandpa’s. Heck, we didn’t even root for the same baseball team - He the Cubs and me the Reds! But even as my dreams grew and changed, one thing remained the same - I still wanted to grow up to be just like my Grandpa – honest, caring, selfless, strong of will, gentle of spirit, a man of quiet yet strong faith - a man of integrity.
Today (like most fathers), I struggle with the task of raising a son who thinks his Grandpa is way cooler than his own Dad. But the lessons I learned growing up have become the key to living with that frustration. What I have learned is that if I can teach my son to be proud of his name Riley Eugene Frieden and the stories and heritage that have come before it … If I can remember to teach him about the man who started this tradition --- not what he did, but who he was and what he stood for ... If I can do that, I will succeed in teaching my son the most important lessons in life:
When you grow up, Grow up to be just like your great grandpa and your grandpa - that's what I have tried to do. Learn to say your name with pride and hold your head high.
You are a Frieden … an R E Frieden and that means you share a something with the man I have called Grandpa all my life.
Learn to be like him and you will become a man of Honesty, a man of Caring thoughts, a man of selfless action, a man who was strong of will and gentle of spirit, a man of integrity, and a man of quiet yet strong faith.
Some will ask what's so important about a a name?
The answer is not much unless that name was R E Frieden and then it can mean everything.
Thanks for that lesson Grandpa. You never taught that to me … you just lived it every day.
The answer is not much unless that name was R E Frieden and then it can mean everything.
Thanks for that lesson Grandpa. You never taught that to me … you just lived it every day.
Rodney, it was wonderful to hear you share you thoughts and memories of your grandpa (my uncle Bob). The love that your grandparents gave to all who knew them will not be forgotten because it is a living, breathing love shared by many. You have a wonderful gift in sharing the words that God gave us to guide and direct us and to know that we are loved by him. I will think of all of your family as you move through the year of firsts without your grandpa. I will forever cherish the memories that I have of Uncle Bob and Aunt Bonnie. Blessings on the Friedens as you adjust to this new chapter of your lives.
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